• Lydia Walker

How Bad Do You Want It?



So, I’ve already failed at my 30 day challenge. I missed yesterday's article. But something that I’ve realized about myself, at least of lately is that I like to start things and not finish. I wish I could tell you that I didn't have 10 books that’ve I’ve read half way, got bored, and put down, but I do. But I’m a firm believer in there are no mistakes if you learn the lesson. Yesterday, I had a busy day, but there was a pivotal moment in the day where I could have went to my room and started to work on an article, or watch a movie with my roommate, and I choose watch the old movie “Short Circuit”. I want to say it was worth it, but there was a slight guilty feeling with me the entire time I watched the movie. I feel like I failed a little bit, but at least I’m learning about myself.


Yesterday, I woke up late (9:15am). I’ve been having trouble sleeping for the last few days, it’s like my mind as been on overdrive. I have some personal things going on with my family, and I knew that today was going to be extremely stressful. And, emotionally, I must admit I’m drained. But that’s why I sort of took an off day. Don’t get me wrong mowing the lawn for 2 hours in 100 degree weather in Texas yesterday took a lot of energy, but I actually enjoy mowing the lawn, so it wasn’t like I wasn’t having fun. To me it’s just a meditation and workout all in one, the heat makes me feel like I’m just sweating all the toxins out of my body, finally getting a totally new body, an upgraded body. And, I actually did do 4 out of 5 of the things on my list, but unfortunately I didn’t do the one thing that will bring me closer to my dreams of blogging for the people to help others. So, I’m sharing with you my fails, so you can see this is not easy.




In fact, when I got back home today at 8pm, I just laid in bed exhausted and wanting to quit this whole 30 Day Dream Challenge. I was just going to go on there, and delete my post, and not harm, right? Wrong! I’m tired of quitting when things get tough, and today was tough, and I still decided to dedicate time to this blog. Yesterday I did 4 out of 5 and today as I’m writing this, I’ve done 4-5. The missing piece today is it's my “rest” day, and I haven’t done any yoga yet, but I never said how much yoga. So, I’m going to do at least 15 mins of yoga today, and I will be back on track! Sure, it’s not perfect, but I’m still giving it my best, which needs to be better as I’m being very honest with myself.


Also, another thing I learned about myself, is my focus is off. I have so many ideas, and things I want to pursue, but like the greats says, I need to focus on one task at a time. I’m helping my family right now, and it’s taking a lot of my time and energy, so if I’m to do this tomorrow and succeed, I have to wake up extra early to do this stuff or it probably won’t get done.


I have never wanted more in my life to be a better me. And I know that I’m not supposed to focus on the money, but never in my life have I wanted to work for myself then now. I still haven’t figured out how to make that happen, but I’m doing my research.

Guys, life is going to throw curve balls at you, and you have to be prepared to adjust, and bee humble bumble enough to say that you are wrong or messed up. I’m here, telling you I’m not perfect, but I’m here to still try, and do it until I accomplish my goals. Thank you for reading! If you loved this article, please share, and till then! Remember you to can

BeeTheChangeOverTime!




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